Photoshoot for me!

I think I've finally got some recent pictures of me that I might actually like (or don't cringe too much when I look at them anyway)! Must say thanks to Rachel first of all for taking them and doing such a fantastic job (given that we work together on shoots before I knew she would get the best pics possible).

I was actually trying out some different lighting and background setups for portrait work; we can't afford to get the frames and special paper/material that would be used in a studio, nor can we really transport that kind of kit to the places we wanted to shoot. So I came up with a slightly cheaper alternative using bed sheets (it's surprising how big a king-sized sheet actually is: 275cm square!).

I did try and take some pictures just using the remote trigger for the camera but it was much better to ask Rachel to do things properly. Also this meant I got to have some pictures of me: I've actually wanted some more up-to-date shots as my profile images are looking rather dull.

Anyway, we spent a rather fun afternoon shooting me in different outfits - also meant I got to learn a bit more about poses and camera angles as this is something I need to get a bit more experience with. I've uploaded the pictures I liked the best to my website, these are processed (very little) by me. Rachel has done some more interesting processing of the images and I'll try and get these uploaded at some point as well.

Overall, a very productive Saturday :)

Single Again

While it was an obvious shock for alot of our friends, Rachel and I were heading for yesterdays 'serious' talk for quite a while, the conclusion of which was that we have decided to split. We'd had a few discussions about things that we each wanted out of life, love and relationships, and it become more and more obvious that we were very different in many respects. So, in the end, there was little we could offer each other than simply friendship.

It all sounds very organised and clinical and, while there was alot of holding back tears from both of us last night, it was quite surreal at how quickly we decided things and then went about updating FaceBook to remove our relationship from there. That does make it official these days, once all the social networking sites have been updated then it's the truth, final, indisputable.

We slept apart last night and just started a fairly normal day this morning. I don't know how Rachel is dealing with this or what she feels at the moment. For my part I'm burying this among many other feelings and thoughts I have cluttering up my head. If I think too much about this, like any of the other things on my mind at the moment, tears pool in my eyes and I have to fight to get everything under control. I know that I will have a 'good' cry at some point soon, it's just a matter or time.

It is the right decision and I don't think either of us had been completely happy being in a relationship which we could probably see wasn't right for us. But it's still sad and it's still a shock to have life change so quickly. It's odd to now be single again, feeling a little direction-less and empty. Maybe that is why some people stay together because, even if things aren't perfect, it's better than the hollow feeling of loneliness.

Anyway, I best not ramble on too much, I need to focus on all the other plans in my life, the weekends away, seeing friends, holiday with my son, photo shoots, work and a myriad of other things I can keep busy with. Busy is better than thinking after all.

Rainy Day Shoot

Well, it started out with the rather grand, and frankly over-ambitious plan of taking pictures in the rain using a lighting technique that I'd seen but only briefly practiced! Thankfully it turned into an inside shoot with some fab outfits, wonderful background and, as ever, another chance to work with an amazing model and friend, Carmina.The location in the end was the Royal York Hotel near the train station and we will certainly be heading back there again on both business and pleasure; really lovely place and they were very nice to let us shoot inside at such short notice.

I still have alot to learn about getting lighting right, particularly using the flash when bounced (it's a little easier when you have proper lighting and a studio/controlled environment as you can move things around and fiddle more ... when you have one light source on the top of the camera it's a little more interesting!) but my learning curve aside it was fun to try different thing as well. The shot above is an example of this where we wanted to get the tiles on the floor in the picture, so Carmina just lay down and we took a few shots that way! Same with the picture to the left, it was just an idea to try this, and I think it works.

Also Rachel took quite a few pictures that she later processed as black and white to great affect. I have to admit I've never really been a fan of monochrome pictures, I can see that they are more detailed and often convey more meaning and emotion than colour but I think I just like to see everything as real as possible, as if it was there in front of me. However, I thought I would give it a try anyway with a picture that was a little too over-exposed in colour but which, I have to admit, looks at least marginally better in black and white.

Anyway, ultimately it was a very productive, and most importantly, fun shoot even after the slight disorganisation at the beginning and impact of the rather too rainy rain! I've been practising more with off-camera flash and I will actually do a shoot at some point using that ... and maybe even in the rain too (with lots of big umbrellas!

[ Update: The full-sized versions of these pictures can be seen on my deviantART page under this gallery ]

Finally Photo-processing

Just to boost Rachel's ego some more (not that it needs it at all) the above is one of the pictures I took while practising with the new lighting set I bought. Rachel didn't need much of an excuse to get herself made-up and looking sexy and was more than happy to pose, pout, and occasionally offer advice on how to get the best pictures.

I have actually got a rather large back-log of pictures of all types that need processing though today I've at least managed to make a significant dent in this. I should be finished by the weekend anyway and then I need to keep on top of any new pictures that come along.

The majority of the pictures are going to end up on deviantART as that will host the full resolution shots and also allows me to sell prints - once I get this all setup. The idea being to try and make a small amount of money out of photography which really is something I need to do given the amount I've invested in camera, lenses, lights, etc!

If anyone wants any photographs doing, let Rachel or I know :)

Manic Shoot

Rachel had the idea of doing a completely random and impromptu photo-shoot with as many models as she could get. I think she managed to organise and arrange all of this in just over a week and we had a whole afternoon taking pictures at Orgasmic in York (which we're told will soon become part of Revolution which is next door).

There was three of us taking pictures that day, Rachel herself (also doing make-up, styling, organising, etc, etc), Jo doing fantastic photography and helping me out (and lending me lenses), and me. I should make it very, very, very, clear that Rachel and Jo have been doing this quite a while and they are both amazingly accomplished, experienced, and confident photographers. None of these adjectives apply to me!

Taking pictures in this kind of situation is hard, really, really, hard work and takes an immense amount of skill and expertise. Having a flashy (no pun intended) camera and a few good pics will not get you through this. You have to know what you are doing, have an aim to achieve and a good idea of how to get there. It is thinking and acting under pressure. Rachel and Jo can do this without much apparent effort, I am not there yet (and may never be).

However, it was a good learning experience for me and, at least looking back, a fun, enjoyablem, and rewarding way to spend an afternoon and I'm really unbelievably thankful to Rachel and Jo and the models who were there; Holly, Richard, Suzanne and Sarah. I only hope the pictures do them justice!

I've yet to process all of the images (and am going to spend a long time getting them looking as good as I possibly can) but for now, here are three of the ones I liked the best (this doesn't mean they are good by any means).


We were taking turns photographing each model and I started working with Suzanne who was so lovely and friendly and looked absolutely stunning. She's modelled before and frankly she was helping me out so much in terms of just ideas and poses, I had no idea what to ask her to do but that was fine as she already knew. There is a large mirror on the way to the toilets and I really wanted to get a nice shot with that but it was really difficult given the lighting and angles available.



Next was Holly who Rachel has photographed a few times before. Apparently she has never done professional modelling before and so far has only worked with Rachel. I have to say I think she is a natural! She's also fantastically nice and wonderful to chat with. We decided to do some pictures outside but had so much 'fun' with the rather strong wind and the sun that kept changing it's mind - it's hard enough for me to get the exposure settings right once let alone having to muck around as the light fades and then increases again. Anyway, Holly was very helpful and patient and the pictures do seem to have come out quite well.

Last, but by no means least, was Richard and Sarah. I think by this point we were all quite tired and I just wanted to do something silly. Rachel got MUCH better pictures and certainly more stylish ones of both Richard and Sarah but I like this one as it was the expression that I'd wanted to capture, and that was so elusive due to someone having a fit of the giggles.

So, overall it was a good day and everyone seemed to have a lot of fun. I definitely learnt alot including the fact that there is so much more for me to learn! I'll update this post with links to all of the pictures once I've processed them.

[ UPDATE: The processed images have now been posted on my website, see this page for links to the three galleries that I've produced. Warning the pictures are quite big! The full sized versions of the best of these still need uploading to deviantART, will do that tomorrow ]

Fashion Event

This is the last event that Rachel intended to run for now as it takes quite alot of effort and she is so busy with more pressing matters anyway.

We had quite a few people turn up this time and I'd like to say that I managed to capture it all in photographs, but I didn't. Instead I spend the time before everyone arrived taking pictures of Rachel in the, only slightly extreme for her, make-up she applied for the night.

Anyway, I had a fantastic time, it was nice to meet new people and catch up with friends such as Freya who was modeling some of the clothes on the night. And I have to say that Stonegate Yard is a fantastic venue and does really nice food as well.

More Photography

It's been a rather hectic week, and in fact I can't believe so much has been squeezed into it. Mainly work-related activities for me and that seems to have been taking alot of my concentration and time, but Rachel had her interview with Blackpool for a place on the photography degree course and I'm sure there were other things going on aswell (I must *try* and keep this blog up to date then I have a record of what has been happening in my life).

This weekend was equally packed with two photoshoots on Saturday in York. One of these was to give Rachel's new sword an outing and the other to get some images for the webzine. Of course both were intended to be fun, and they were, both models, Freya, and Lizzie were fabulous to photograph, they both look amazing and are so friendly, chatty, and just wonderful to work with.

I should say that I don't have anything to do with organising the shoots or the styling on the day; all of that is down to Rachel; she sets everything up for the shot and I'm just so lucky to be there at the time to be able to take advantage of the opportunity and get take my own pictures! Really, I have such a long way to go with this, but it's so much good fun that it's worth doing all the practice necessary to get better.

I need to do more practice now since I went and purchased an upgrade to my existing camera (a Canon 350D) I've now got a Canon 5d which is going to take me a while to get to grips with. Rachel got some amazing pictures with it on Saturday afternoon and I also managed to take some of Lizzie which I'm very happy with.

Here's links to the latest pictures I've taken

• More spring related images
• Scenary around York University campus
• Picture of Freya, barbarian princess
• And finally Lizzie looking fabulous
  

Hen Do!

Well, hen "dos" would be more appropriate as we were out on Friday night and then again on Saturday! I should state for the record that I wasn't drinking a drop of alcohol for the second outing as frankly I'd got an absolutely stinking hangover from the previously nights ridiculous excesses! No sympathy please, it was totally self-inflicted.

Thankfully I did manage to get some good photos (Rachel got some amazing ones) and I wasn't drunk enough that I lost or broke my camera either! The image above is one of quite a few that turned out beautifully clear, sharp in such vibrant colours (helped by the "wig" theme for the night). I'll update this blog post when I've uploaded all of the pictures to my website, I really do need to get the image galleries sorted ASAP.

The pictures from Saturday night weren't anywhere near as good in terms of colour and clarity which is surprising given that the lighting should have been better as we were at someone's house. I think I'll put that down to fatigue on the part of myself and Rachel!

York Photos

Rachel and I hadn't been out for a walk around York for quite some time so we finally managed to get ourselves into town to take some pictures, get some exercise and spend some time together. Sadly didn't get much in the way of good photos, still think I need to work on focus, composition and probably even post-processing. I guess I could use the excuse that it was a little flat in terms of light (well, so Rachel said). Anyway, we did have a nice walk, and lovely cream tea and cakes at Betty Tea room so, all in all a pretty good day.

Photo Shoot

I haven't been with Rachel on a photo shoot for quite a while now so it was nice to actually be involved with one again in York, even if I was mainly there to setup lights and help out as I've done before. I still think it's fantastic fun and I love meeting new people who are always so nice to work with and chat to.

We were doing a fair bit of swapping on lenses for this shoot - Rachel has been using the new 50mm f1.4 (prime) lens that I bought which can, if like her you know what you're doing, capture some fantastic detail and clear, crisp shots. I made plenty of mistakes with the lens while in Paris and alot of my pictures looked terrible (when Rachel used it, her pictures come out fine or quite simply amazing showing again that it really isn't as easy as it looks).

Anyway, lots of help, advice and encouragement from her and some luck actually meant I didn't do so bad; the picture above is one that I took! Couldn't believe it when I processed it, it's come out just how I wanted (though it needs a little more processing to get the colours right). I also tried to be a bit arty and took this picture as well:
The full shoot was over fairly quickly and we managed to get everything dismantled and packed away in plenty of time - I think we're just getting practiced at this now! The full gallery of pictures of Sasha (the lovely model - who had some fab Vivian Westwood boots, need to try and get some myself) can be found on the Random Acts website. I should say that all but two of the pictures are Rachel's (though the ones of mine she used have been processed so much better by her) - again, this highlights another big difference between enthusiastic amateur and pro; I got one of two pictures that were "wow", Rachel got a few more than that!

Finally, I decided that the whole corset-trying-on experience had been so inspiring that I managed to find one of mine that a very good (and generous) friend gave me, and wore that. So I couldn't resist getting a few pictures of me as well.

I did quite well with the corset on, managed to wear it most of the day, in fact only started to get uncomfortable after Rachel re-tied it at the back and tightened it quite a bit in the process! Also quite pleased that the blouse that I'm wearing fits and doesn't look too bad! I bought it a while ago and never thought I'd 'grow into' it!

Empowerment Through Style

Friday night was the event that Rachel had organised at Stonegate Yard in York, "Empowerment Through Style" brought together several independent, local, boutiques as well as the Body Shop, to show how feeling good about yourself isn't always about fashion but simply putting together your own look that you can be confident about. My friend Jen (see earlier post with her posing in a red corset!), very kindly, offered to act as a model for clothes and make-up (the picture above is Saskia from the Body Shop doing her make-up which looked amazing!).

We all had alot of fun, the clothes, as provided by One (Responsibly Gorgeous Clothing) were fantastic (so much so that Jen actually bought the outfit she was wearing) and everyone mingled and had a good chat. One thing that really stands out in my mind was trying on the corsets that Sarah from Elizabeth Wells had brought along. They did look fab but I wasn't initially thinking of actually having a go myself but I'm so glad I did!

I should say first of all that this isn't the best picture of me, nor of the corsets that Sarah sells, in fact I'll add a second picture below of Hannah who looks so much better than me anyway and utterly amazing in the gorgeous white corset (I tried this on as well but no pictures of that unfortunately).

The black corset I'm wearing isn't full size, though it's slightly on the large size for me apparently (didn't feel like it) and Sarah didn't fasten it very (relatively) tightly but it still did give me more of a figure and actually was very comfortable. Yes, I know that doesn't sound right but really I didn't feel like I couldn't breath or that I was being painfully squashed, it felt fine and also made me sit straighter and with much better posture. It also made me feel pretty good as well.

Trying on the full size white corset was amazing! I wasn't brave enough to do this will no t-shirt or bra on, which I should really have done, and I've kind of regretted that as it would have been fantastic. I am definitely going to get a proper fitting and try on a few different corsets when I get the time (and the money) to do that. Really I'm not sure how to describe how good I felt with the corset on - it's not anything kinky (though I can fully understand why people like them for that reason) it just feels really amazing to have that shape and feeling of being so poised, stylish, feminine I guess. And it affected everyone there, loads of people wanted to try them on and everyone was thrilled once they did. Really I haven't got the words to describe it!

Anyway, a fantastic night was had by all and I really hope Rachel organises something similar, only bigger, better, and starting sooner and finishing later, sometime soon!

Paris

Seems so long ago but it has only been a week since we were sat in the lesbian club drinking mojitos and looking at the fantastically stylish people around us ... and sticking glow-sticks down my bra (yeah, one to many drinkies on my part I think). Anyway, I'm getting ahead of myself!

The trip started at a reasonable hour on Thursday, from a rather cold York train station with us both rather laden down with bags containing camera equipment and, for me, a ridiculous amount of clothes, make-up, and assorted shampoo, conditioner and other bathroom 'essentials'. I travel heavy!

We had a nice trip down to London, then carted all our bags across London to first go to Rachel's GIC appointment (stopping off for lunch at a nice little pub first where I gleefully remembered I could actually have a drink in the middle of the day since I didn't have to drive at any point over the weekend!). Though against my usual 'rules' of footwear (and style) I was wearing walking boots which frankly was the only sensible option, I'd have very poorly feet if I'd worn my other kind of boots!

Getting to Kings Cross St Pancras and we had a pre-trip Starbucks before going through the check-in and security - same as airport setup but nowhere near as busy or time-consuming! You go through French passport control on the way out as well, bit odd as we weren't in France yet (nothing in Paris in this respect at all). We didn't have to wait long before they opened the doors to let us up onto the platform so we could get onto the train.

The trains are a little dated by today's standards but they are quite comfy and the legroom is reasonable. I was cheeky and got some plastic cups from the lovely man in the buffet car so Rachel and I could have a drink of wine on the trip (thought I'd start how we meant to go on)! Also thought it might pass the time a bit but really the journey doesn't take that long, you're only in the tunnel itself for 30mins tops and the rest is spent speeding across the French countryside - seems faster than on the UK side.

We found the hotel without any issue (I have Rachel-Nav) and set off out to take some pictures of Paris at night. Walked what seemed to be miles (or kilometres) and got back to the hotel late once we'd reach the point of being rather cold and tired. We did make a slight tactical error in that we set off with the intention of a certain route that avoided an area near the hotel that the guide suggested we stay away from. Of course we ended up wandering into it and only realised after a few clues like the condom machine fastened to the wall and the woman who must have been rather chilly given she was wearing a almost invisibly short skirt, stockings/suspenders and a big coat. Rachel described the area as "less that salubrious" though I guess it still had a certain ambience! Thankfully we got back onto the main road once we realised our mistake.

Slow start in the morning and ended up having a lovely brunch followed by more wandering round Paris all the way from Notre Dame along to the Champs Elysée stopping off to have a lovely drink and cake on the way. After taking pictures of the the Arc de Triomph we decided to head back to the hotel via the metro to avoid more tired feet. A quick doze at the hotel was followed by venturing out to the gay/lesbian area of Paris, a quick bite to eat (along with some nice wine) and then one of the local bars. A few drinks were followed back a stagger back to the metro and then back to the hotel.

The following day the weather was a little more on the rainy side so we took the metro to the Champs Elysée and found a nice restaurant to have more fantastic food! Thankfully the rain cleared while we ate so we could do some more wandering around afterwards and eventually headed to Musée d'Orsay so we could see a bit of art and also be somewhere nice and warm!

We were both enjoying the warmth and excellent photo opportunities when Rachel's camera stopped working! Neither of us have ever had any problems before but in this case the memory card could just not be read which was all a bit of a disaster! Thankfully Rachel was able to use my camera to carry on taking pictures and, in the end, when we got back home I was able to retrieve all of her images anyway.

In the evening we got dressed a little more smartly and headed towards the canal (not far from the hotel - useful given the shoes I was wearing) and had a lovely meal (and wine) before heading back to bed for a nice hug and sleep before having to get up early in the morning to head back to the UK.

Trip back was equally rapid and uneventful. Nice to be able to see the country-side this time (it was dark travelling there) and at least we knew when we were getting close to London as Rachel pointed out various landmarks. Got back, dumped bags at left luggage and then headed into London to entertain ourselves until our trip back to York at about 10pm! I'll leave all that for another blog post.

Random Clicks

Paris was fantastic but I'm currently too tired to give a detailed explanation of what we saw and did there as we didn't get home until 1am this morning and I stayed up a while longer trying to recover all of Rachel's pictures from a corrupt SD ... which thankfully I was able to do!

Anyway, in lieu of a full textual description I'll just include a few of the pictures I took for now and will add another post later to link to Rachel's images as well as also explaining what we got up to.

Paris by Night

Still got to process alot of the images properly but here's one from the night we arrived.

Right, time to get sorted and head into the city for more food, erm, I mean photos.

Food!

Well, there is obviously going to be something of a time delay getting pictures and blog entries up given that we should be out and experiencing Paris rather than sitting in front of a computer! Since I'm recovering from a late night and also reviewing the pictures anyway I thought I'd do a few posts.

And the first subject is FOOD! (yes, I'm feeling a bit hungry as I type this, must get a move on). Anyway, this is what we feasted on yesterday brunch time and it was delicious!

As well as capturing the food I was trying to show off with the new lens as well, it certainly does give nice clear and sharp pictures, hmmm looks good enough to eat (must get up soon, getting really hungry).

I'll leave you with a bit of a puzzle. Spoons in drinks, why (had several like this yesterday):

Dressing up!

I don't really remember doing much dressing up when I was little, I maybe did go through that usual phase when I was very young but it's not something I can recall. I do have fairly clear memories of NOT wanting to dress-up and being quite embarrassed about costumes and the like, certainly I never went to any fancy dress parties!

But things do change and access to a rather interesting wardrobe of 'dressing-up' clothes, courtesy of Rachel (items she's used on photoshoots before) and of course her, armed with camera, to record the results, has opened up quite alot of possibilities! The picture below being an example of this:
My friend Jen came round on Friday night, originally for a girlie night in that was to include food, endless chatting and equally limitless alcohol. Rachel and I had been talking about photoshoots to Jen and we just suggested we could do a few pics to practice ...

... well that's when it got out of hand! We essentially turned the sitting room into a studio with proper lighting (those big lightboxes you see on the pro shoots, wish I'd got a picture of the setup it looked very impressive). The pictures here are just a few samples, most were taken of Jen on her own (she's alot more photogenic than me) and I'll add a link to those once Rachel has processed them properly (they will likely be on the Random Acts Webzine so keep an eye on that).

For anyone who is a little scared of having their picture taken I have to say this: don't be! It is, once you get into it, sooooo much fun! Really just go for it! A good photographer like Rachel will be happy to work with you to get what you want and delete images you really aren't happy with, or, if you want it, do a little touch up work in PhotoShop if that makes you happier :)

Really, and truly, a photoshoot is fantastic fun!

Relationships

Are complicated.

That isn't obviously earth shattering news and I guess most people go through a fair few in their lives. Personally I don't think I have had that many and, so far there has only been one long-term relationship that I have been involved in so I'm not the worlds expert in this area and the pithy conclusion above is actually quite a step for me.

As it might have been apparent from Twitter and the recent blog posts, Rachel and I are back together. I'm not going to go into the full reasons why, suffice to say that, well, it's complicated! That does sound somewhat negative but again, to me, anything beyond the most simple union is a new thing for me.

From my own personal perspective the last month has involved a lot of learning on my part, I really haven't been able to just rely on my rather simplistic model of life to get me through. I'm not always right for example, and sometimes things are more involved than you expect.

I admit that this is all a big vague and cryptic but I think that the best thing I can learn from all of this is to just try and enjoy every moment you can, not stress out too much about myself or the other person I'm involved with and, most importantly, to TALK. I know this shouldn't be a problem for me but I guess it is. You live and learn :)

It's not as easy as it looks!

On Sunday, Rachel and I went out to do some photography, the idea being for me to actually get some practice and to be 'in charge' of a shoot. We had the idea of doing a kind of "Death" character, I know that sounds a little macabre but I was thinking of the version from the Sandman comics which is a rather attractive and sassy gothic girl.

Anyway, Rachel looked fantastic in the black velvet coat, and suitable make-up but when it came to me actually being any good at taking pictures and having even the slightest clue as to what I should be doing it got a little more difficult. At that point I had something of am epiphany and realised with amazing clarity that taking fantastic pictures of someone really is alot harder than it looks! Rachel really, really does know what she is doing and has an amazing amount of experience and knowledge which means that she can just do it! I was going to say "without apparent effort" but that would be misleading as she is always moving around, getting the right angle and multiple shots.

I can't say I was really that happy with the pictures I got on the day and they looked a bit mediocre (at best) on the camera's screen. Thankfully, due to Rachel's help, advice, patience, support and the fact that she is an amazing model (when she doesn't pose too much lol), I actually did manage to get some good pictures of her. In fact Rachel was happy enough with the images to upload them to the Tigg-stock collection on Deviant Art. I have to say I'm actually quite honoured that she did that, there are so many other fantastic photo's that she and others in the team have created.

When I've got round to sorting my website out (hopefully later this week) and uploaded everything I'll add a link to the complete set of pictures that we both took on Sunday. For now I'll finish this post with a photo that Rachel took of me. The biggest problem I have with any pictures Rachel takes of me is that they are very clear and very detailed and frankly I can see how bad I look, so much so that I got quite upset last night while looking through them. I feel a little better today but I think that's because I'm following this mantra: "Give me the strength to change the things I can and the grace to accept those that I can't".

Not a happy Christmas

I'm not sure what to say and I am just too upset for words really and on the edge of crying constantly but I guess if I at least try and write down what has happened it will explain, maybe make things worse, maybe make me feel bad as I think of the consequences. Sometimes things just hurt those involved so badly but there isn't anything you can do, it is just that way, no matter how much you wish it wasn't.

I have split up with Rachel.

The timing couldn't have been worse. As I write this I can see the mess I have made of Christmas and New Year for both of us. This season is just wrecked, completely and totally. It's a hideous, horrible, time now, all plans are out of the window, everything we might have done to have fun will not happen - the people we were going to see, the things we were going to do.

All ruined because of me, I was the one who ended the relationship.

I really don't have words to describe how I feel, sad, lonely, alone, isolated probably don't even come close. Confused as well, not sure what to do, and where to turn.

The finality and impact of the decision really hit home when I saw how fast the news appeared on the various social networking sites ... not only have we split up we have now had that made 'official' by Tweets, change in FaceBook status, and now this blog entry.

I really don't know what else to say. I need to try and get some sleep I guess before I can face the reality of this tomorrow. I'm not sure I want to face it, not sure I can deal with this Christmas anymore.

Christmas Party

It was the works Christmas party last night, held in the York Railway Museum! It was fantastic, really amazing setting, great food, drink (though didn't have much of this as I was driving), good fun and most importantly wonderful people. As I said to Rachel last night, this is the best place I have ever worked, I love it!

Rachel an I took quite a few pictures, I'm being shamelessly vain in just showing (mainly) the ones of her and me (mainly me) here on my website. Rachel did get some pictures of other people which look fab but I'll leave them in her more capable hands for processing.

We had a fantastic time, sadly all too brief as we needed to get home and to bed, which first required us to walk through the freezing night to the snow covered car and then for me to negotiate roads already starting to slush/ice/freeze over. This morning arrived rather too quickly (must catch up sleep over the weekend) but with fantastic wintery scenes for a trip to work.