Counselling ...

... or not?

Just to catch up a little since I haven't posted anything over the past few days I'll say a little about Sunday evening, this being my father-in-laws birthday meal with kids and grand-kids etc. It went okay in the end, in fact it seemed that everyone had a good time (though the food was pretty much below the standard I get use to when travelling so much - sorry, I'm a snob about alot of things now!).

The atmosphere was quite relaxed and 'normal' though I still did have time to look at what the waitresses were wearing (not that impressive, black and comfy being the main theme) and the make-up they had on (much more impressive). So, still thinking like a TG person rather than a guy!

Monday was meant to be annual review time and, from a financial point of view this was something that could have alot of bearing on how well this split could go, if at all! Unfortunately it got postponed until Tuesday!

Monday night we talked some more and got a bit upset and I tried to suggest counselling as a way to try and deal with what was happening to maybe help us both understand what the other was thinking and why; I wasn't trying to say that this would solve our problems, just that it might help us through them with less pain. This was, after some more tears, agreed on and I booked the appointment - I have to admit feeling quite scared about this and the reality of what I was doing did hit quite hard.

Anyway, my wife decided that I wasn't really understanding how she felt about everything and also didn't think that Relate would help - I have to admit I was sceptical about it all as well so I can't blame her there. So she must have talked to C who then came round and all three of us sat down to try and go over everything.

We talked for a while and C was quite objective about everything and also positive in some ways saying that, while we clearly couldn't continue to live together like this that we would all remain friends and that we were both young enough to have the chance to have a new life apart and that it was probably all for the best. We all seemed to agree and certainly we both said to each other after C left and the following morning that we felt some relief.

But, really it's not that easy since there is no clean break. I can't afford to move out now, so I'm sleeping in another room. There are lots of practical things to work out and it's all going to take time but the longer it takes the harder it is and also the more chance there is that it'll feel like we're getting along and I may slip back into the comfortable feeling of 'normality' .... all of which may be followed by an almighty argument!

Anyway, lots of things happened on Tuesday which has meant more confusion! I'll post about that in a while but I think it's about time for the next instalment of "Star Wars" ...