Friday, 31 October 2008

Sober rant

Still feeling a little hard-done-by at the moment. I don't see that it's fair that I haven't really done anything horrible or nasty and yet I'm the one who had to move out into a little flat (okay, it's quite a nice flat and I'm thankful for that) and am not in a nice warm and cosy house with a gas fire and lots of space and home comforts.

Not entirely sure what I'm doing for Christmas/New Year at the moment but I'm pretty sure I won't be seeing my family and I seem to only have the chance of being with my son on Christmas Eve and for an afternoon on Boxing Day, both subject to me presenting appropriately.

And the whole presentation thing is probably worth a rant in it's own right - yes, I know these things take time where children are concerned and I don't want to rush subjecting my son to the whole new image at once. However, the rule is that I must present completely as male when I see him, no ifs or buts or plan to gradually acclimatise him to how I will look eventually.

I'm having to deal with changing my whole identity and image and coping with this while not currently on hormones or having had any surgery or anything that might help me feel better. Forcing me to wear clothes and present in a way I am not comfortable with is, objectively, cruel at best and tending towards totally unacceptable.

Anyway, best get on with some work and calm down, will try to rant less in future.

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